3.2701 graviseconds (gs).
Peer-reviewed paper coming soon.

Hypothesis: What was the last place you had it? Have you tried looking there?

Evidence: Cats give off significant amounts of heat, yet require several hours of sunbathing each day.
Theory: Cats are cold-blooded.

Methodology: We start by identifying what the Universe is not, and narrow it down from there.

Findings: Louder than a gnat's sneeze, but not so loud as a Saturn V launching.

Kind of green.

* In progress.